Thursday, December 30, 2004

Dear Dickhead Lawmakers...

... murder is already illegal, morons.
Today we have a story about a 22-year-old gangbanger and 18 fellow thugs who are going to be tried as terrorists because of a number of criminal acts. Not that I'm defending the murder of children, (though some might, as long as they're Iraqi children) robbing restaurants, shooting teenagers or firing randomly into crowds, but we used to call such acts "murder", "robbery", "attempted murder" and "crazy as a snake's armpit" respectively, or, more generically, "crime", because not everything that makes you afraid is a terrorist act.

But that point has escaped the walnut-sized brainpans of lawmakers in 33 states. No, we need special statutes because killing frightened people is apparently worse than killing people who aren't afraid to die . Forgive me, or hell, don't forgive me, but this has "hate crime legislation" written all over it, and it's just as boneheaded as that idea. Everyone pay attention: murder, robbery and assault are already illegal (hence the monicker "crime"). Increasing penalties because of the ideas people have in their heads is thought policing.

I'm all for a distinction between malice aforethought and crimes of passion. Penalties for impulsive actions under stress should come with an option for amelioration, but please, people, if we're going to try citizens for conspiracy to:
“intimidate or coerce a civilian population.”
then by God, I've got a long list of powerful people who work at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue to haul before a grand jury.

Look, America. I've been patient, but this is it. Don't make me stop this country and come back there.


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